I was wondering the other day when the primary reason for knowing you were abducted by an alien was getting alien anal sex by a probe. There are always two criteria to being abducted; one is the loss of time and the second is having anal sex. Truth be told, that could actually be just a really good weekend for someone and have nothing to do with aliens.
As I thought more about this, it seemed really strange to me that an alien would come all the way across the universe to explore someone’s ass. I understand that any advanced species that can travel across space and time would be considered explorers, but let’s be honest, they aren’t exactly going where no man has gone before. Well maybe they are going where some men haven’t gone before.
It seems a little odd that a highly evolved alien would be so concerned about an anus that they would actively seek to abduct and violate some random person’s ass. What were we sending into space on all those rover missions to contact extraterrestrial life? Were we sending hard core gay pornography? Do the aliens think we communicate through anal sex? I’m not picking on homosexual men, it’s just I have never heard a woman say they were abducted and given anal sex for the reason’s of testing. I still don’t get what the hell an alien could learn from anal sex. Why is that not considered? Lots of people on earth have anal sex and to my knowledge no one has learned the secrets of the universe from it.
Seriously, are we really that naïve to not recognize that something that has the ability to traverse the universe, defy the laws of physics that we understand, build a ship that cannot only survive the vigorous realties of space but also continuously support the crew, would they not also have superior medical technologies? The ship would obviously have the ability to withstand multiple or simultaneous nuclear blasts, would not be affected by radiation, might even have an invisibility cloak; do we honestly think a species such as that wouldn’t have an MRI?
Think about when you go to the hospital. The first step is not an anal exam. Even in our limited technology we do have a machine called an x-ray that can easily tell what we need to know without going to extremes. Do we think that a superior species wouldn’t?
Is the concept of alien anal probing and aliens just meant to instill fear of aliens in humans? What if the aliens performed oral sex on everyone they abducted, would we be so concerned about an alien invasion then? If they gave the best oral sex in the universe people would be building additions on their house just so the alien could have a place to stay when it got here, provided it performed the oral sex probing on a daily basis. We might have lotteries to see who got the pervert alien roommate.
I have watched a lot of science fiction shows that depict space travel and I don’t recall the medical office ever using an anal probe when someone was hurt. As a matter of fact every space movie I have seen never involved alien anal probing, because well, they have extremely advanced technology. They can perform brain surgery with a hand held device without cutting skin. They clearly don’t need to stick something in your ass.
If there was such an advanced civilization that could travel the stars, I highly doubt they would need medieval techniques to perform an observation of the human body. By the way, that’s how I know aliens don’t anally probe people; no one ever said the aliens made them clean the pipes beforehand. Even humans with our limited technology know to do that.
The Deviant View on Alien anal sex
I don’t know if there are aliens, I think a logical person can conclude the universe is a big place, most of which we know nothing about. Do I think we have been visited by them? I don’t know, I never passed out black out drunk and had someone shove something up my ass to confirm to me they were of alien origin.
What I do know is that if aliens are performing anal sex on people to figure something out, why don’t we all have anal sex all the time? If an advanced alien species thinks the answers to the universe are in your ass, shouldn’t we be having more anal sex?
I made this up one day because I started to wonder how many times I could say or reference anal sex in a “polite” conversation. It’s a “taboo” issue to talk about and I just like to humor myself, so I came up with the post you just read. I’ve actually used it a few times in conversation and I honestly don’t think anyone got offended. Just goes to prove the point it’s not what you say, it’s how you say it.
If aliens are performing anal sex on people maybe I discovered the way to find the answers to the universe. What do you think?
By King Deviant
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