I remember meeting my husband for the first time and the feeling that came over me. It’s easy to remember because it was the first time I had felt such an intense feeling the moment I met someone. That was the feeling of knowing I had met the person I hoped to spend the rest of my life with. Today, long after the honeymoon period has passed, I still want to spend the rest of my life with this amazing man who stole my heart. But sometimes I have to remember to show him how much I care and love him.
Life’s Distractions Take Over
Through the years, we bought a home that requires much TLC, raised two kids and are raising two more, gone through job changes and two or three businesses, and aged ourselves. Life is constantly throwing us curve balls and the world around us has changed, to no fault of our own. There are more distractions today than ever before. Some time ago, I realized the toll that all of this has taken on our relationship. We still have a great relationship but I’ve personally let life take over a little too much and let the relationship take a back seat. I immediately decided to change that and that’s why I am sharing this with you today.
The Honeymoon Period Forever
We’re all familiar with the term the honeymoon period. It’s not that we stop loving each other after that time, it’s that we let life’s distractions get in the way of putting our relationship first. We start focusing on what we don’t love about our partner instead of what we do love. We simply forget to show our partner how important they are, and forget to remind ourselves how much we love him or her. I am lucky to be with my husband, I know it and I want him to know it every single day.
Strong relationships require care. We stop nurturing our relationships because we are too busy, too distracted, or just because we forget how important that is. You can’t expect your relationship to be great if you aren’t putting the work in to keep it great. So how do you do that? You can start by making an effort every day to show your partner how much you love them.
Appreciation, Respect & Affection
Appreciation, respect, and affection are three important ingredients in a relationship. Let your spouse know you appreciate him or her. You appreciate how hard he or she is working, you appreciate how great a parent him or her is, and you appreciate having that person in your life. Saying “thank you” is a simple phrase that goes a long way. We harp on our children to say thank you but we forget to say it ourselves. Saying thank you, like you did in the honeymoon period, tells your partner that you are acknowledging their action, not taking it for granted.
Respect your partner like you did in the honeymoon period. Listen to how you speak to your spouse, not just what you say but how you say it. No one wants to be lectured or be spoken to in a short way. If you are stressed and snap at your spouse, you are redirecting your anger on the person you love and that’s not fair. Remember this is the person that you chose to spend the rest of your life with. If you wouldn’t speak to a stranger this way, you sure as hell don’t want to take that tone with the most important person in your life. Take a step back and think about your words, it will take you a long way. Respect your partner’s opinion too. You didn’t marry a dummy, so don’t blow off what they are thinking or feeling.
The last and possibly easiest way to show someone you love them is with affection. King Deviant wrote a previous post about always smiling at your kids. Take that advice with your spouse as well. Smile, hug, kiss and shower your partner with affection. The response will be redirected back to you. Being physically close to our spouses is good for us. Laugh together and smile just because you are happy to see him or her. Get back to the snuggling teenagers you used to be, if even for fifteen minutes a night. Hold hands, steal kisses, and beam with excitement to be near each other like you did in the honeymoon period. You likely have forgotten how good that feels and will be thrilled to have that feeling of closeness back.
A Better Relationship Starts Today
Relationships are hard work but fun work. If you want the excitement and happiness you used to have with your spouse then you must rekindle the early feelings and share them with your partner. Make an effort to show your spouse appreciation, respect and affection. The rest will come naturally and you will find that your whole life will get brighter. You are lucky to have found the person you want to spend the rest of your life with so act like it. Don’t let life’s distractions get in the way of the great relationship you have with your partner after the honeymoon period. He or she is the most important person in the world so nurture your relationship and the benefits will be huge for both of you.